to exercise or not to exercise, that is the question.

So.
Exercising the bod, exercising the mind, exercising the faith.
Exercise?....lets dive into this word. (No pun intended)
The word exercise comes from the Latin word exercitium same as exercit from exercere which means "to train" originally this word came from the word arcere which means "to restrain".....wow, can you see why the word exercise came into being? It is like the antagonist of restrain or an alternate extension of that word.
I can see first hand where you would have to restrain to train, to say no to one thing which means yes to another.
I have been exercising a lot lately, on many levels. I know that change comes when you do something different. And I have so many things I want to change.
So YES!, I am off to exercise! To change my destiny....to exercise my faith (and my fanny).
Give me strength Lord, to restrain and train myself.
Thank you for giving me vision.
You are the Almighty God!

Patient Patient

Patient Patient
Be still
Wait on your healing
give yourself some rest
Listen to the test

Patient Patient
You will recover eventually
the pain is only for a season
Everything happens for a reason
Learn the lesson,
Well.

Patient Patient
In all the sickness
that haunts today
Keep your cool and
the hate won't stay

Patient Patient
Let the surgery be done
Take out whats bad
Leave the good alone
Let it run its course

Patient Patient
There is nothing left to do
Nothing left to say
Nothing left to pray
Patience just stay

Patient Patient
wait
for another day
Speak good words
that encourage my heart to love,
Again.

Patient Patient
you wait so patiently...
your healing is just around the corner.
all of this won't be so painful
in tomorrow

What follows?

I imagined my life after I got saved to be something, well something more sweet, painless, or smooth. To my amazement I have found that the Christian walk is tough. Hands down. Everyday I deal with choices, choices of today and choices of yesterday. Reaping of past disobediences can be HEARTBREAKING, and trying to make good decisions in today and following God's will can be sometimes overwhelming but..........................Grace abounds. I believe He has an awesome plan for me. I want to believe that He has my life, my marriage, my daughter in His hands. It is so hard sometimes to just believe. It's as if THAT, is the battle....the "good fight of faith". I know God has recovered me, and redeemed me....so why does it feel like I am still paying for my stupid decisions? My mom recites the scripture..."It rains on the just and unjust"...but something inside me says "No!" I don't want to settle for that.... am I being disobedient? does God allow me to suffer to learn a lesson? I want so many things for myself now, my family, my daughter..... but I spent years yearning for nothing, just roaming this earth, dead. Am I reaping from those times? Or is it oppression, depression, frustration? I have faith hope and love for goodness in my life, I have tasted and seen that the Lord is good. Please Lord, Heal my heart and renew my mind.....give me your strength to see your will in everything that I need to. Give me patience, love, kindness, and long-suffering.